love changes everything

“O what a wonderful thing is love, which makes a man shine with so many virtues and teaches everyone, no matter who he is, many good traits of character!” (Capellanus, 31)

I choose this quote to analyze because I think it establishes the true definition of love and the characteristics that come with being in love. This quote reminds me of how we were taught to love and help each other at a younger age. The quote reveals that love is transforming which causes us to be humble and kind. For instance, if you are in love your positive energy tends to shine out on others which causes you to be nicer. Furthermore, love reflects positive energy and character which cause others to gravitate toward you. The section of the quote “which makes a man shine with so many virtues and teaches everyone” (Capellanus, 31) shows that love cause people to have good characteristic and confidence. “No matter who he is, many good traits of character” (Capellanus, 31), this shows that love causes people to be caring not only to their spouses but also to people around them. Being in love causes one's personality to change.

Only a Footman

When reading the story of the British knight, I couldn't help but think that he was sort of "blinded" by love, but not necessarily in a bad way. Any obstacles standing in his way were nothing in his eyes, as earning the love of the beautiful woman was far more important than the dangers of obtaining the gauntlet and fighting foes. Even though the end of the battle between the knight and doorkeeper saw the larger man begging for his life, the sheer fact that this giant man with a massive club wanted to fight and was boasting about his power; the knight seeing him only as a footman was pretty well savage. It was clear that the knight wasn't backing down once the doorkeeper kept pressing on. To the Briton, the girl was the only important thing, and this footman was simply a stepping stone on the path to earning love. (The Art of Courtly Love, 180-181)

Age Matters

Age is a number that matters during this time period because it determines if one is fit for love. "Age is a bar, because after the sixtieth year in a man and the fiftieth in a woman" one is too old to feel the enjoyment and passion one gets from love (Line 15,16 on page 32). However, if "a girl is under the age of twelve and a boy before the fourteenth year," they are too young to experience love and understand the complex rules of it (Line 21,22 on page 32). Therefore, age does matter and has an affect on how one views and understands the rules and complexities of love.

The Art of Courtly Love

As stated in the article “Backgrounds to Romance: Courtly Love” by Dr. Schwartz, the primary audience for romance and “early vernacular narratives” were women and ladies of the queens court. I learned this was primarily because the early narratives were not focused around violence and tended to appeal more to women. Women also played a lot of the central roles and had large parts in these narratives which women in the audience could connect to. I think this relates to our society today because most romance films and novels are targeted for a female audience, with the main characters being played by a strong female lead and the romantic genre of today tends to eliminate violence.  

In the middle ages, a courtly love narrative relationship was based around a “knight and his liege lord”. It was surprising to me that the lady was most often in complete control of the relationship because when I think of the middle ages, I assume that the men had all the power. An important quote to sum up the actual relationships of the middle ages is, “marriages amongst the nobility were typically based on practical and dynastic concerns rather than on love”. This explains why women of the middle ages enjoyed courtly love narratives because it was an idealized relationship and allowed them an escape from real-life where they for once had all the power and respect from men. I feel this relates to romantic novels and films today because most of the time the relationship depicted is a fantasy relationship that does not exist, or is rare, within the context of real-life. Individuals in the past, as well as the present, enjoy reading and watching romantic relationships that are an imagination or vision of what their lives could be.

A Link to the Past and a Gateway to the Future

When people hear the phrase, courtly love, they often might think of the act of courting someone for the purposes of marriage. This is not that. In fact, most stories on courtly love had nothing to do with marriage. The idea of courtly love stems from the relationship between knights and their lords or ladies. Often in these stories, the romance would be between a knight and a lady of noble birth and would revolve around the knight doing things to win the heart of the lady. These stories were typically targeted towards nobles, particularly women, because of the subject. Courtly love could be compared to themes found in The Symposium which was written by Plato in around 385 BC. This story takes place at a party where Socrates is debating what love is with other philosophers. During the party a theory was posed that humans used to have two faces, four legs and four arms. One day the Gods wanted to teach humanity a lesson and split humanity in half. Now humans have one face, two arms and two legs. This made them feel incomplete and want to look for their other half. To this day humans are running around looking for their other half.  

 Courtly love follows suit in that it tries to define love and paint a picture of what roles each person plays. In The Art of Courtly Love, Andreas Cappelanus states, "Marriage is no real excuse for not loving." (The Art of Courtly Love) This was a radical idea during the time because in the medieval period, people married for status or political alliances rather than love. 
In conclusion, The Art of Courtly Love had a major influence on how society today looks at romance and love. Originally love was not between two people who were married but rather knights and their ladies. Andreas defined the relationship between the lovers as one with a man trying to gain the favor of his lady. Additionally, The Symposium also tried to define what love is and painted the picture of soul mates. These people would be physically bound to one another. Furthermore, the idea of courtly love paved the way for modern ideas of chivalry and what courting for marriage means. Humanity can take these lessons from the past and strive to create a more loving society. 

Courtly Love

Courtly Love is most definitely a romantic notion as "Romance" is defined and thought of today but much different for medieval times. in the 12th century poetry and literature, romantic writings became popular. The audience was largely women. These romantic narratives were pure fantasy with no connection to reality. Women were dominant in the stories and men were more submissive and more focused on love. This was a stark difference from reality where marriages were based more on the nobility and what love. In 21st century narratives, the idea of Courtly Love typically did not involve love between husband and wife but more often a knight and possibly an often married woman. This notion could have been away that married women fantasized about escaping the reality of their own marriages which involved little in the way of romantic gestures or feelings. as pointed out in the article "Backgrounds to Romance", these narratives may have also served the purpose of showing young men the need to show some level of respect and compassion for women. I believe this could have been the beginnings of a culture shift in which men became more aware of women's feelings and the need for respect. Although I am sure at that time this awareness was very small, but the seeds were planted. Today there is a strong awareness of this need and has become a societal norm.

Marriage Is Torture

In The Art of Courtly Love, Andreas Capellanus defines the word love as “a certain inborn suffering derived from the sight of and excessive meditation upon the beauty of the opposite sex, which causes each one to wish above all things the embraces of the other and by common desire to carry out all of love’s precepts in the other’s embrace” (Capellanus). To find the word “suffering” in the definition of the word “love” is shocking. Capellanus later explains that the suffering comes from the constant fear of love ending, “if he is ugly, he fears that she may despise his lack of beauty” (Capellanus). Capellanus lists many other reasons why a lover may fear his love may be lost. To be in a marriage where there is true love would be torture because the constant fear would cause too much suffering. In contrast to modern day, if a person has all this constant fear that he or she will lose their significant other due to love being lost, that would be considered an unhealthy relationship. Modern relationships are built upon mutual love and trust, not fear and suffering. Considering marriage as torture or a prison in modern day is meant as a joke and is not meant to be taken seriously. The way love and relationships are viewed have gone through a major transition.

Capellanus, Andreas. The Art of Courtly Love. Columbia University Press, 1960.